The date-night that wasn’t~Project Marriage

My Project Marriage submission this month is not a normal submission. I am writing about the fact that I was not able to fulfill the challenge with a “away from home” date.

Project Marriage

This month’s challenge was Date Night.

I have a confession to make, my husband and I don’t use (non-family) babysitters. We just don’t. My kids are now tween/teen and they have been left in the care of non-family members a handful of times at most.

This month has been busy, hectic, hot.

We’ve had A/C outages and family out-of-town, out-of-town family in town. Birthdays, a funeral, and people in the hospital.
All that is to say, it’s not been a month where I felt comfortable asking any of our family members to kiddo sit. It felt like I’d be imposing on my family when they already had a lot on their plates.

Many people would (I know) just order a pizza and leave the tweenlets at home, but I’m not there yet. I can’t just leave them at home and enjoy an evening out with the Hubbs.

I would not enjoy myself. I’d be worried about my offspring the whole time.

THE. WHOLE. TIME.

I’d worry that they would pick that night to begin playing with matches, catch the house on fire, forget how to use the doors, lose their phones, and forget to stop drop and roll. Silly I know.

I would worry that someone would break in to our home and they would forget to hide, forget to call 911, drop their phones, and be hurt.

I would worry that they would decide to take up knife juggling and impale themselves.

I. WOULD. WORRY.

My children would not do any of these things, I have bright children. They are capable young people who could be trusted to be left alone for small periods of time.

I. WOULD. STILL. WORRY.

So, no big, fancy date night. Instead, I will tell you about what we might have done if we had been able to have a date night. I’ll also tell you where we’ve stolen a little alone time this month.

Our date night would have been at a German place not too far from us. We would have enjoyed a great live band (hopefully our friends would have been part of the band that night), we would have had all different types of German sausages and Sauerkraut (which I adore). Their Sauerkraut is a little sweet…it’s fabulous. It’s similar to the Sauerkraut my Grandmother use to make.

We would have had 1, maybe 2 of the German beers. Probably only one, because they’re VERY stout. We (maybe just me) would have done the chicken dance.

It would have been a wonderful date night, but it was not meant to be this month.

What we have done this month….

This month my Hubby and I have spent special time together in the evening after our tweenlets have gone to bed. We have a pool, so after kiddo bedtime we’ve gone swimming. Just the two of us. One of us with a glass of wine and the other one with a beer (guess which has wine and which has beer), we’ve splashed around the pool, talked about our day and enjoyed each others company.

Pool time=mini date time.

My submission for Project Marriage this month is unconventional, but I hope it is still link worthy.

This post it linked up with Mommy Friend and Life Without Pink

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23 Comments

  1. Oh girl, at least you tried πŸ™‚ I am the same way as you. Even though my boys are still young, I haven’t left them with anyone but family AND when they get older I’ll be sooooo nervous to leave them alone. However, you can always do date night at home {did you see my vlog}? lol Thanks for linking up #projectmarriage

    • I’ve not had a chance to see the vlog, they don’t always work on my phone. I’m on the computer right now so I’ll check it out.

      My tweenlets are 13(almost 14…gosh MOM) and just turned 12. I leave the almost 14 year old home when I go grocery shopping…errands like that. I don’t leave the 12 year old as often, she is less comfortable being left alone.
      I’m not sure when I’ll feel like it’s okay to leave them for hours…I’ll let ya know.

  2. I think your pool time sounds wonderful – you donΒ΄t have to be out, or at a restaurant, or in a bar…the important thing is to be alone together, to relax, to communicate and to be happy in each otherΒ΄s company!

    • I agree! Chicken dancing aside, it was awesome.

  3. Would it be possible to have a date night at home? The kids could have a certain part of the house and unless there was an emergency you two could be alone and watch a movie. Or is that a stupid nonparent suggestion?

    • Greg, that’s not a stupid suggestion. Not at all. If my kids were of an age that they could be corralled that would work. The goal was not to talk about the kids. We had a great time lounging in the pool after our kids went to bed, and never talked about the kids.

    • Kid emergency is not the same as an adult emergency. Kid emergency can = “I just wanted to say Hi!” Kids are natural attention seekers. You’re idea is a good one, but my kids would not cooperate with it.

  4. We didn’t manage a date night either, but we did watch movies together after putting Thor to bed, so I’m counting that!

    • I would too! I’m totally counting the pool time. When your tweenlets don’t go to bed until 10PM, date time is limited. πŸ™‚

  5. I like this! Your mini dates sound perfect, and even more relaxing/enjoyable than big fancy dates that have to be planned (and may result in parenting stress :D). The small things are what really count and have the most meaning, anyway.

    • That is very true! πŸ™‚

  6. Janice

    Oh, we have date night at home at least once a week or every 2 weeks. Fortunately for my husband I’m a night owl so as soon as kiddos are off to bed, and hubby is off from work, we have our little date time. Of course, this summer has been challenging cuz the older kids won’t go to bed since they don’t have to get up early. And it’s been a bit difficult lately with our 3 year old who keeps waking up to crawl in bed with us around midnight or 1am. But as soon as school starts, things will be back to normal… πŸ™‚

    But I know what you mean. We’ve never had sitters and every once in awhile, auntie can watch them but she has such a busy social life, it doesn’t happen too often. The way I look at it, kids are kids for such a short time. Gotta enjoy it.

    • I’m not the only one who is weird about babysitters. This is comforting.

      πŸ™‚

  7. Leaving kids home alone at any age can cause problems! Your date nights in the pool sounds so much more satisfying. Sorry you have not had the easiest of month’s JamieAnne πŸ™‚

    • Thanks Tandy. Poop happens. Hopefully August will be more calm.

  8. I am the same way with babysitters. Sometimes instead of worrying myself to death while away I would just rather stay in and then do exactly what you and your hubs did. Mini date night. Personally, I feel like a date night in the pool in the dark is quite frisky and romantic in itself! πŸ™‚

    • πŸ™‚ not being alone on this babysitting thing makes me feel a lot better.
      I love my mini dates, they’re with the best guy ever.

  9. I definitely understand the issues with baby sitters. It is hard to find someone that you trust with your most precious gifts. I love the alternative idea that you came up with, and may consider a date night at home myself in the future. Thanks for sharing!

    • Thank you for the comment! Spending quality time with your spouse is totally do-able even with out a baby sitter, just have a mini-date. πŸ™‚

  10. So, you don’t just go out to eat with your name and leave your teen/tween at home for a couple hours? Are you comfortable with doing that? I’m always intrigued by other parents. How long is “too long” to leave your children or at what age will you do so?

    • We’ve never left them at home alone and gone out to dinner just me and the hubbs. My son likes staying here alone, and does so frequently when I am going to the grocery store or other shops he’d prefer not to go to (Ulta, Kohl’s, Target……) If I am going to be gone more than a few hour, I usually make him go with me. He’s 13 (almost 14), so he feels okay being left at home. My daughter does not enjoy staying home alone (or with her brother) as much, so she usually goes with me. I have not left her home for more than 30-40 min, maybe an hour. It’s as much about her comfort level as it is about mine.

  11. Too bad you couldn’t make it out for a date night, your plans sounded like fun. Hey, there’s always this month to get out and play. Oh, and I TOTALLY think that date night at home counts as date night! I wish I had a pool that the hubster and I could splash around in.

    • Thanks for the comment Mychal! I love the German restaurant! πŸ™‚

      Also….

      ********Thanks for being my 1000th comment! Woop! Woop!********

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