The Power and Love in a word.

What things do you say to your children that might seem mean or unfair to them, but are words you speak with love?

(An open letter to my children)

As you have grown, you’ve heard the word “NO” quite of lot.  In fact, “No” was one of your first words. Of course, your first words were hi, bebe, mummum and dadda, but “No” was soon to follow.   What you didn’t realize then, may still not realize now, that I hope you will someday realize is…….I say “No” because I love you.

a sweet little girl

A sweet little boy.

In the beginning the No’s were little.  No, baby please don’t touch that.  No, baby that could burn you.  No, baby please don’t put that in your mouth.  No, baby please don’t play with that.

As you grew, so did the “No”s.  No, I’m sorry, it’s not okay to cut a plugged in  electrical cord with scissors.   No, I’m sorry,  it’s not okay to bite your sibling..just because you’re mad.  No, we can’t have a pony…please stop yelling.  No, you can not jump off the roof of the house.


All of these things I deny, because I love you.

You are both entering teen hood.  You are both becoming wonderful, loving, intelligent young people. As you move through puberty and find out about new and even more dangerous things I will continue to say “No”.

I’m sure you will believe that your Dad and I are horrible and mean at some point.

I’m also sure that at some time during your teen years, you will probably believe that you truly hate us.

You won’t really hate us, but you’ll feel like you do.  During this time I will still love you, and I will still say “No”.

When you were young we read you the book:

Just in Case You Ever Wonder  by Max Lucado


We wanted to make sure that you always remembered that we were on your side, that we loved you and that we would always be there.  That has not changed and it will never change.

If you do something wrong, we will still love you.

When your grown and have children of your own I’m sure you will understand that “No” does mean I love you.

Until then, just remember that We love you………and put that 2nd cookie back in the cookie jar. No, I’m sorry, you’ve already had 1 cookie and 1 is enough.

 

 

My sweet daughter, with her Great-Grandmother

This is usually how pictures go today...he hides. He's still sweet, but he's picture shy.

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6 Comments

  1. This made me cry. My oldest two children are almost 10 and the other 12, the youngest is 4. I know what you are going through. I write them letters often, and tuck them away in their baby books, so that they can someday read them and maybe understand so many of the things that are often difficult for them to accept when they are young. Lovely post.

    • Thank you. My munchkins are taller than me now, 11 and 13 (going on 30). So, not really munchkins anymore. I love the idea of writing letters and placing them in their baby books.

  2. Since I’m not a parent, feel free to disregard this. But too many parents seem to fear saying No. My parents sure didn’t. I think it’s part of the job description. My parents excelled at their jobs!

    • I don’t think that not being a parent excludes you from an opinion. You had parents….good enough. You can ask my kids, I do not slack off in the no department. I had to say no tonight, to my daughter going to a sleep over. She is sun-burnt from a school day at the water park and she’s hurting, but kids don’t think that way. They don’t think long term, it’s up to parents to teach them to do that and make those decisions for them until they are able.

  3. Made me cry! What a beautiful and heartfelt post. Thanks for sharing it with us.

    • Thank you. I loved your post today, you look nothing like a Slot. 🙂

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